Sister’s back in July 18, 2009, in my blog, I asked a simple question, “Where are the fearless men?” and it appears on that day I had company over for breakfast, so I never put any thought into that question. However, my Lord heard my question.

This Chica was married to one of those fearless men for twenty - five years and after Chris died I truly believed that he was the last fearless man on planet earth. NOT!

Let me introduce you to another fearless man, Steven M., apparently, not the last one on this planet (There is Hope ladies), the Lord had this man well hidden from other women, a good thing for me. Sisters, when this Gift from God fell into my receiving arms, I said Yes Lord, destroyed my fishing pole (a metaphor for reeling those men in) and bought some new high heel shoes.

Chicas, I would write some more on this topic but I have things to do today, but I would like to mention this point. Sisters’ this relationship with Steve is unlike my relationship with Chris, on so many levels, I will not bother to explain, BUT I like this experience so much more, I have peace. I know, that I know, it is a God thing.

Chica’s, I confess, I stepped out in the flesh in regard to Charles B, the Lord must have snickered at that move I made, because He led Steven M. into my life at the same time. Giggle. Giggle. And I do not mean the dance. During my momentary lapse of reason, the Chica’s never reprimanded me once; they merely occasionally uttered “Wait. Wait” but my dumb fleshly ears only heard “Blah, Blah”. Anyway, my brief walk in the flesh led absolutely nowhere, except a minor disturbance in the force to the flesh, and my brief interlude with Charles B, blew up like the Death Star.

Here is an interesting tidbit, a few days after my first date with Charles; Diana asked me if I completed “The List”. The List is a petition to The Lord and at this time I will not offer an explanation of its content, hopefully anyone smart enough will understand the meaning in the following sentences. I did my list which contained 12 items (a motorcycle not included) and Chicas during that brief 4 week episode with Charles B, he only met four requirements, but not the top three which are very important to me. However, during these last two weeks with Steven, he has met eleven of them but most importantly the top three, I had to make a minor adjustment in one of them; but a slow dance every so often will suffice and the remaining one,time will time.

God is Good Chicas’, lesson learned, stepping out in the flesh leads nowhere, interestingly enough Sister’s, the Lord is teaching me something else at this time in my life too, a very good thing but at this time I cannot offer the words to explain it.

But I can offer this piece of wisdom in regard to the Spirit vs. Flesh, choose the Spirit.

Paul states in Roman 14:17 that the kingdom of God is not found in the law of the do’s and don’ts but in righteousness, and peace, and JOY in the Holy Ghost. Sisters’, a genuine joyful life in Jesus surpasses the typical miserable normal life that most Christian people live nowadays. Never going back there ever again, could not even if I tried. If that devil wanted to trade the JOY I have in the Holy Ghost for a billion bucks, I would laugh at him so hard that tears would run down my cheeks and I would have to find the nearest bathroom, quickly. (Diana knows why)

Oh the freedom that is within my being, nothing compares to Him, most days the joy flows, but every so often that joy feeling is better than the forbidden subject (s#x) that some Christian people do not mention. By the way, Virginia, your Facebook status remark, “You go girl…be joyful” is absolutely on the mark, nobody ever writes this “You go girl…be miserable”, that would be funny though.

Sister’s I know my life and yours as well, contradicts the typical Christian way of life, we are unusual, we oppose everything the world and religion has to offer, I love it.

Testimony time, I remember my life long ago as a religious & fearful woman (20 years of Miserable) than 2 years ago I am faced with a choice awaiting me. On the left side Chris’ death filled with fear and anxiety and on the right side Chris’ death, along with courage and strength. The right side won.

Like the old hymn, “The world behind me, the cross before me No turning back, no turning back”. Good reasons to be Joyful Chica’s, even in death, my Chris is in the Joy of the Lord literally, yet I am living it here on earth in the indescribable Joy of the Lord too.

I miss him Chicas’, those green eyes, his laugh, and his conservations with me about the Lord. One day!

Good news, God never expects anything from me, so he is never disappointed in me. Nevertheless, I am commanded to do only two things, love the Lord my God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with my entire mind, and with all my strength: second is that I shall love my neighbor as myself and when you love the Lord with everything that is in you, faith, and obedience and trust all walk hand in hand too or at least try to. No one is perfect.

Chica’s, I remember when I truly believed that the Lord expected me to be a perfect christian, a good girl, a nice girl, but the bad girl would show up throughout the day and she would do something that was not on the good girl list. As usual my heart felt that I let Him down again and of course those feelings of failure inevitably would show up followed by failure’s buddy Condemnation. Exhausting!

But these last two years I have walked in real freedom, those false expectations, fear of failure, and condemnation have all disappeared when The Lord revealed to me that He NEVER expects anything from me, so He is by no means disappointed in me, ever. Not once does He look at me with eyes of disappointment and then walk away or wiggle His finger at me and scream, “Why did you do that?”

Now, when I do something on the naughty list, I receive His forgiveness, forgive my self, and move on because I can guarantee you that I will mess up again. In fact I am having bad thoughts at the moment.

Sister’s, there is freedom when we walk by faith, with our heart and mind continuously focused on the Lord, living a  supernatural life, a life the world and even a man can never provide us Chica’s.

Lastly, since the Lord places no expectations on us, as His Children we should never place our expectations on people either, particularly on those we say we love, if we do this they (people) stay free as well and the plus side is better relationships with all the peeps in our lives. A Good thing!

Sisters, my life is rich, full of good things, I have troubles, loving friends and family, a bothersome knee, two sisters that I like and love, persistent gray hairs, Bibles, electric bills, a loving church family, various men in my life (assorted variety), but the best part is my relationship with the Lord. What more can a girl ask for?

Life is good, only because I know deep inside of me that I do not have to worry about anything. I said it before and I will say it again life’s problems in general are only speed bumps, they might slow me down a bit, I get up, dust myself off, then STEP OUT in FAITH.

Never again will I allow the thief to steal, kill and destroy this Chica’s life. Now and forever, I have the life that Jesus wanted for me, I must admit it did cost me, why not me, Jesus sacrificed himself as well, yet the Father had a plan. And my pain turned into joy and now I am fearless and free, and so is Chris Rippstein free as well.

Looking back at my other life, it really was not life, I was pretending to live, merely surviving, but now, O my Lord, I feel like doing the Giggle Dance. It is good to be free, so good!

Philippians 4:11-12 Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need.

WARNING, before you proceed ahead, I am going to talk about a subject, typically not talked about around the Christian cliques, SEX a subject not suitable for the weak-minded, judgmental, religious person.

Vickiepedia time, a very loose summary of the above scripture, bound to offend some religious peeps, “I am not implying that I need a boyfriend, manfriend, boytoy, companion, or even intellectual conversation, for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am (Oregon or California), to be content this past year. I know both how to be a widow and single, I know how to have plenty of sex to no sex at all, every where and in all things I am trained both to be pleased and please back, and to be hungry and to suffer need.(mostly the latter).

I am so bad! But it is true!

Sisters, contentment is defined as the state of being contented; satisfaction; ease of mind, happiness, gratification. Chicas, Joyce Meyer’s definition states it even better, she says it means, “Satisfied to the point where you are not disturbed no matter what is going on!” Sister’s, I can testify that I have been mucho disturbed physically by the 3 M’s, men, males and a man, not necessarily in that order. The “man” is easing the suffering a bit, but again the flesh is never satisfied it wants MORE.

On the reverse side is discontent which means unhappiness, which if not dealt with quickly leads to complaining, grumbling, murmuring, next depression, and unhappy faces. :(  This Chica has decided to deal with the 3 M’s quickly, only one thing to do Trust God, which happens to be the answer to all of life’s woes. Poof! No more 3 M’s. Off course not literally, they are physically still there but now they are not hindering me in a spiritual sense.

Time for a pep talk, I will be satisfied to the point where I am not disturbed no matter what is going on, I must remember that this is the best time of my life and I am where he wants me to be, and he is even in charge of sexual matters. My Joy comes from my Jesus, my Savior and my God, truthfully I am not genuinely content even sexually till I Trust God fully in ALL matters.

In a past blog I named this dance The Happy Dance, however in honor to The Tall Chica it will be renamed the “Giggle Dance”

Isaiah 43:18-19 Remember ye not the former things, neither consider the things of old. Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert.

Once upon a time a young chica fell in love with Prince Chico and she sort of lived happily ever after. Unfortunately the ever after part lasted only 28 years (Prince Chico died), but she is not complaining because that is a long time compared to most fairy tale marriages.

Her hopes and dreams were in that marriage, sadly most of them were never her dreams, again she is not complaining, Prince Chico took care of her with all his heart. The mistake rested on her shoulders, she believed the lie that she was to pour ALL herself in her husband’s hopes and dreams, eventually toward her children dreams, but never on her own dreams.

Sister’s this topic of dreams began when I heard John Maxwell ask this question on a Joyce Meyer podcast, “Is my dream really my dream?” When I heard that question something stirred inside of me and I knew it was self examination time and the answer to that question woke me up. Truth, Chris’ dreams were my dreams, but he is with the Lord, not with me, time for a new book of dreams.

Now, the young chica now an older Chica, woke up after Prince Chico died, it has been one year since, and now hopes and dreams anew are stirring inside of her, some of those were hidden but are starting to resurface. Time to step out and Trust the Lord and discover the exciting details of those dreams and see where the Lord leads me in this adventure of God’s Will for my life.

It’s not the end.

Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.

Who can satisfy my soul like you,
Who on earth can comfort me and love me like You do,
Who could ever be more faithful, true,
I will trust in You, Lord
I will trust in You, my God

Living Water, rain down Your life on me,
Cleansing me, refreshing me with life abundantly,
River full of life, I’ll go where You lead.
I will trust in You, Lord
I will trust in You, My God

There is a Fountain
Who is the King
Victorious Warrior and Lord of Everything
My Rock, My Shelter
My very own
Blessed Redeemer Who reigns upon the throne

Who could ever be more faithful and true
Lord Jesus, Lord Jesus,
Lord Jesus, there’s none like You
(chorus)

by Dennis Jernigan

Something, inside of me, I cannot explain. A feeling beyond words,

A glimpse,
Running, walking, smelling, touching, feeling,
Brings tears to my eyes as I write
Hear a fighter jet flying above in the skies,
I love the sound.

Something good is going to happen.

Reminisce,
Slow dancing with a man you want,
Do not let this end,
The energy,
Excitement,
Desire,
I feel that too.

Something good is going to happen.

Last time I felt this way, last year, when the Love of God brought me out.

Expectation
Hope
His Love
Freedom

Something good is going to happen.